Emoticons of War

This is from an old New Yorker piece I had saved and just discovered on my desk.

By Tom McNichol in the Dec. 10, 2007 issue:

:-)

No new attacks reported today.

:-(

New attack reported today.

=\:-)=

This email is being monitored by Uncle Sam for your protection.

:-x

I'd rather not say in an email that's being monitored for my protection.

:-w

Our current leader speaks with forked tongue.

*:O)

Our current leader is a bozo.

/:-=(

Our current leader in some ways resembles Adolf Hitler, at least in his disregard for civil liberties during wartime.

:-o

Uh-oh, what was that?

:-@

I hear screaming.

B)

Now donning protective goggles.

.-)

Good Sammie Davis, Jr., movie on tonight.

+<:-)

Pope to make appeal for peace.

(:3

No, I am the Walrus.

:(=)

Interesting Jimmy Carter piece in today's Times.

[:-)

I am listening to my iPod.

3:-o

Bovine encephalitis attack!

:-)8

Latest George Will column still doesn't get it.

@:-[--

New Osama bin Laden message released.

8-/

Local chemical attack causing blindness.

:-#

Kiss your ass goodbye.